Tuesday, 4th October
Two weeks in, and things are becoming slightly more familiar but in a good way?? Who knows...
The buses have started to make a bit more sense (ish). Although every time I get on I still have to ask if they are going to my stop. One time I got off at the wrong stop and the bus driver shouted at me and told me to get back on the bus. The following five minutes were full of shame and embarrassment – and giggles coming from behind.
I have also signed a lease for an apartment for the next 5 months! This terrifying ordeal took place in a 7-11 (a popular convenience store). We had to hand over 178,500NTD in the form of a mountain of cash. We conversed in a convoluted Chenglish and received numerous dodgy looks from casual shoppers.
Dad kindly informed me to ask them about a diplomatic cause – meaning that if there was a national emergency, we could leave the country and end our lease without any additional fees.
Funnily enough, our translation attempts were less than adequate. For some reason the only word we could think of to explain this 'diplomatic' cause was 'war'. As you can imagine, the W word didn't go down very well and both the landlord and estate agent became incredibly nervous, while we tried and failed to take back our accidental threat. We later got told off by the agent – warning us that the landlord nearly backed out of the deal – oops.
I also stepped foot in my first club this weekend. Although I almost missed my opportunity!
Clubs in Taiwan require you to have proof of three vaccinations, whilst bars require two. However, while in the queue for the club, I realise I have no idea where to find proof of my third vaccination. I try to log into my NHS app but it has sent a verification code to my UK number – the SIM card of which is sitting on my desk at home because I am now on a Taiwanese number.
The bouncer is getting impatient because I am obviously struggling to come up with a solution. I take a deep breath and do my best to explain to this bad-tempered man why I can't get my third vaccination proof.
After a few minutes of communication struggles, this situation escalates somewhat and ends up in an disheveled argument that consisted of me pleading with him and being kicked out of the queue.
At this point I am fed up and tell my friends to go in without me, I go into my wallet to find some money to get home but my gaze falls on the vaccination cards that I so cleverly kept for this exact circumstance.
Half relieved, half-mortified, I saunter back up to the bouncer and swallowing my pride, timidly hold up the cards. He rolls his eyes and ushers me in to the club – score!
The inside of the club was actually really cool, the only problem was that it was completely empty – we had arrived at 11pm to get free entry.
I invited my classmates to come with me in order to break the ice a bit – bearing in mind I am referring to an entire glacier – these people are incredibly socially awkward and never speak!
The rest of the evening consists of me doing my best to talk to all of them at once because they are not speaking to each other. I constantly go up to different groups of locals or internationals and introduce them to everyone, but they are standing like statues, holding their drinks and looking around. I am feeling hopelessly stressed until something magical happens.
Queue Taylor Swift...
My queen has saved the evening! As soon as Queen Tay Tay makes it on I am have lost all inhibitions and worries, I am dancing to this song like my life depends on it – because my evening does. I have obviously made such a fool of myself that my classmates begin to relax a bit and start knee-bopping to the beat – success!
The aftermath of this night bites me in the arse for the following two days. I spend my entire Sunday trying to recover – I have no idea why I ordered whiskey and coke! Come Monday, I no longer feel ill but there is some hangover grump.
In my class there is a 35-40 year old (no one knows) who drinks copious amounts of coffee every day. But he doesn't drink it from his flask or a mug or cup like a normal human being – no – he pours a little bit of coffee into the little lid that the flask comes with then lowers his mask and tips it down his throat like he's taking shots.
Now, usually this doesn't bother me too much, but for some reason, I was feeling a whole other level of aggravation. Call it sleep deprivation or hangover, but for some reason seeing this man shot his coffee at 8am made me so angry that I had to close my eyes for fear that I might act on my aggressive instincts.
In my defence, I have not been able to fart in days for fear that my roommate might hear.
